This shit is my new SB banner when I get the time [and don't you motherfuckers be stealing it]. SB totally identifies with mental asylum patients for somewhat obvious reasons.Actually, my Great Step-Grandma, Bertha, was in an asylum for awhile. I'm not sure what my good-looking, blue-eyed Great Grandpa saw in her. That ho was no catch. She was a big load of trouble, and she wasn't even good-looking. She had frizzy hair, for chrissakes! Bitch couldn't cook either. She didn't have the mental capacity to follow even a simple damn recipe. She probably couldn't even fix a damn hot dog and boxed macaroni-and-cheez. Maybe her ass was hot in bed, though. Actually, strike that. I don't want to even think about that shit because it's pretty fucking gross.
Anyhoo, I don't know where Great Grandpa and Bertha met, but it was sort of unfortunate for the ENTIRE family, other than the fact that Grandpa wasn't as lonely.
One time my Grandma Peg loaded up Great Grandpa and Bertha's freezer with meat, but thought maybe she forgot to plug the freezer in (since it had been empty before), so she phoned Grandpa up, and Bertha's crazy ass answered. Grandma Peg instructed Bertha to go out to the damn garage and plug the cord to the freezer in, so the meat wouldn't spoil. Well, I guess the damn freezer actually was plugged in, so mental Bertha got confused and unplugged the fucker. All the meat went bad and stunk to high heaven. That ho couldn't even be trusted with the simplest task.
Also, another time Grandma Peg went over to Great Grandpa's house, and she was brushing Bertha's hair for her with an old-fashioned bristled brush, and Grandma stepped away for a hot minute to answer the door, and when she came back, Bertha's ass had eaten all the bristles off the brush. When Bertha's ass smiled at Grandma, the bristles were hanging out from between her damn teeth, if you can believe that shit.
IMPORTANT NOTE: Bertha was my Step Great Grandma and NOT MY GENETIC RELATIVE!
