This Shit Has Ceased To Be Funny

NEWS FLASH: David Letterman is really impressed with himself. I think he's a supersilious asshole.

First, let me just say that Joaquin Phoenix is smarter than David Letterman will ever be. Second, let me also say that I am really getting frightened about Joaquin's situation. He so obviously has a problem and needs some sort of help. This shit has ceased to be funny. For once SB is not being a smart-ass. I am entirely serious. Watch this clip from the Late Show this week. I don't really find it funny at all. I find it highly upsetting. And I'd like to slap the smirk right off David Letterman's stupid snide mug.

I wish Joaquin had told Dave to get fucked.

The Joaqster Is a Grouchy Bitch

You've probably already seen this, but I just love to watch Joaquin get huffy! We are so much alike, we are practically THE SAME GROUCHY PERSON! Okay, I was having a Stalker Ed moment there. I'm over it now.

Okay, This Shit Has Just Gone Entirely Too Far Now

Somebody's ass needs to get the Joaqster some help. This is no longer funny--its, well frankly, delusional. I have to say I am fond of Joaquin, we're both grouchy bitches, and I tried to be supportive of him in his career changes from actor to homeless person to rapper to homeless person, but SB just can't support this shit. I AM NOT ON BOARD WITH THIS, JOAQUIN.

What Happened to This Ho?

Clearly that guy has mistaken the Joaqster for a homeless dude and is about to offer Joaquin his half-drunk beverage. It was an honest mistake. Look at him!

Obviously, the helpful guy is one of SB's blog readers, and he is putting my Bust a Nut for America plan to work. He's out trying to help the homeless, people! He's making America a better place for you and me to live! I bet he even 'splained to Joaquin: "This beverage is compliments of Sarcastic Bastard and the Bust a Nut for America campaign!"