I'm Posting to Say I Will Not Be Posting Today

My ass is crabby today. I have been staying up FAR TOO LATE watching the shows I've recorded on the new DVR. Also, I've been having a spicy Bloody Mary or two or three and that makes my ass even tireder. I made up a word. So there. I'm an English major and an editor, but I'm not anal about proper language usage. Fuck it. Sometimes made-up words pack more punch.

Anyhoo, I'm posting to say I'm not posting today, motherfuckers. The rain will not quit here in Buttfuck, Ohio, and I am just mean as hell today. If I don't get some damn sunshine soon, I'm going to kill somebody--perhaps the dumb sonofabitch in the white Toyota, who didn't bother to stop and take his fucking turn at the 4-way stop on my way into work this morning. Then, when I put my hands up in whatthefuck'sthematterwithyou despair, the jerk-off asshole cocksucking motherfucker had the temerity to wave happily at me. The fucker was just giddy with glee! I didn't say you could go, you dumb motherfucker. Your dumb ass just took the liberty. Fuck you, white Toyota selfish motherfucking asshole with a pin dick guy!

Can you motherfuckers tell that SB would not be good company today? Your asses are lucky you readers are not my co-workers, family, or neighbours today. Count your damn blessings!