Bitch is Fug!

Portrait of a Damn Hag

JESUS. I've seen better looking mugs on meth addicts.

Enough of Susan Boyle Already

SB doesn't giving a flying fuck if Susan Boyle sings like a damn angel. She needs a stylist, and bitch needs to zip that shit up! I do not want to see her damn granny panties. I also think a titsling is in order. That shit damn near reaches her waist! I know she thought she had worn black, so a bra would be unnecessary, but the sight of those sagging twins nearly blinded my myopic ass! Girlfriend needs help and some Spanx.

SB is SO SICK of seeing and hearing about this homely bitch (with a voice like an angel!) that I'd like to lock her up in a basement along with Beyonce's fat ass. We can throw Paris Hilton and Hohan in for good measure. Nobody will miss their dumb asses.

Broke-Ass Beatdown Marilyn Monroe

PUHHHHLEEEEEEEEEEZZZZZZZ. Marilyn is rolling around in her grave about now. JFK wouldn't hit that shit with a ten-foot pole.