Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Rain, Rain, Fuck Off (a letter to the Moms)

Don’t come again some other damn day. Wow, did we ever have buckets of rain last night. I now understand why they say “rain lashing against the window pane.” Sadly it chose to lash after I had already laid awake for over two hours with insomnia. I’ll bet I got all of 3 and 1/2 hours last night at best. Good thing I made lots of progress on the User Guide yesterday. My ass isn’t going to set any records today.

Once the rain quits, I’ll drive over and check your basement. No sense going over until it’s done. Actually, on second thought, I’ll drop by tomorrow because I have to drop my cocksucking rent check at the bank anyway.

Aunt Bev called while I was out walking Kyle, after I talked to you. If Tex and Bob had called, I would have heard from the whole family. Miraculously, Bev didn’t mention Jesus or unleavened fucking bread once. Thank Christ. She said she just wanted to check on me and see how I was doing.

Love you. Love dad. Hate Ohio. This e-mail will be my blog post for today, since it’s full of blue language. I don’t want to disappoint my readers.


Friday, January 18, 2013

Photo of the Damn Day

We've seent this shit before. Russell Brand helps some homeless bitches out and makes the rest of us look wholly inadequate and self-absorbed, which I am--I mean WE ARE.

Warm weather: At one point a street-dweller took off his shirt

Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Shit SB E-mails Her Idol of Greatness, Ms. Moon

The foundation of all abundance is acknowledging what you already have, or so Eckhart Tolle says. Maybe I need so start a cocksucking gratitude journal or some damn shit.