This Morning's E-mail to My Idol, Ms. Moon

I am reading Billy Bob Thornton’s book and really enjoying it. I guess everybody thinks he’s weird, but he seems normal to me. Angie Jolie’s intro was really sweet.

 

Sleeping all day sounds great to me. I love to go to bed at night and hate to get out of bed in the morning. Psychologically, there is something VERY WRONG there. Obviously my life lacks fulfillment.

 

I watched Jersey Belle and sort of enjoyed it. That Jersey chick is a damn hoot. But they always stereotype Southern women, like they are so sheltered they have never heard a damn cuss word before. Also they are all into formal teas and shit. I’d rather have a needle poked in my damn eye than go to a tea in fancy dress where nobody cusses.

 

I saw that about the woman in Tallahassee. Couldn’t the dumb bitch just have told her kids that she didn’t want to watch the grandkids anymore??? WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH PEOPLE????? I heard the little brother heard the 7 year old say, “Please don’t kill me.” Jesus.

 

I have coffee on this end too. Kati Kati blend from Starbucks. Why can’t those corporate fucks ever give anything a normal name? I don’t even like asking for it. I’m afraid I’ll mispronounce the shit.