Wednesday, November 24, 2010

I'm Sorry, but I Think this Is Hysterical

I'll be laughing all damn day. I know it's kind of shitty of me to post this, after saluting the homeless man who returned the money he found in a prior post today, but whatever. If you want consistent behaviour, I'm probably not the blogger for you, so fuck you.

Link to story of befuddled pensioner losing life's savings on his car roof. Dumb ass.
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1332644/Pensioner-loses-80-000-life-savings--leaving-cash-roof-car.html

Looks like the motherfucker won't be retiring for awhile now. I hope he likes decorating.

22 comments:

Jeannie said...

Poor old goof.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

I am still laughing. I'm mean. You know that.

Christiejolu said...

LOL! Poor dude...

Have a Happy thanksgiving!!!!

FrankandMary said...

All the comedies tragiques.
Consistent behavior? If that was a blogging requirement you'd be hearing crickets chirp right now.
~Mary

Denny Coates said...

Given what the banking industry has done to us lately, maybe it's not a good idea to be so trusting. But these cash-only people amaze me. Actions have consequences.

Anyway, it's better to be laughing your ass off all day than to be in a grouchy shitty mood. Have a great Thanksgiving long weekend yourself!

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Christiejolu,
I love you. You do the same!

Mary,
I adore you. Many thanks!

Denny,
You know I love you and Kathleen to death. One of these days, we shall all meet for chicken salad and martinis. Laugh.

Maggie May said...

'if you want consistent behavior..'

made me LAUGH!

Christina @ Fashion's Most Wanted said...

Dear SB, what a total plonker, how can you leave £80,000 on the roof? It must have weighed a bit! My dad once left his wallet on the roof while he was putting the dog in the car, (the dog was a moody bastard and only liked my dad), he drove off and someone found it and handed it in to the local shop with all the cards and cash intact. There are good people in the world xx

Bethany said...

oh man, not a feel good story. Sheesh. dumb ass is right.

drollgirl said...

i am shocked to learn that i am not the only blogger that curses out and berates his/her own audience. yay! :)

Big Mark 243 said...

I don't see the inconsistency. The homeless guy was salutory and this dillweed earned his scorn. What an idiot. There just isn't any excuse for him.

Mark said...

It's hard not to laugh at someone so pathetic that he thought it made some kind of sense to carry 80,000 around with him at all times.
I have to wonder what he would have done at gunpoint. One would have to assume, refuse to give it up--if he trusts his own capacity to keep it safe more than a bank's. So maybe the universe was trying to save his life from the robbery that was about to happen?

Syd said...

Poor old fellow. I understand befuddlement.

Findon said...

Is that softness I detect entering your heat. Have a happy thanksgiving sweetheart.

BMelonsLemonade said...

I love how the writer of the article says, "Diasaster struck..." It makes the whole thing so melodramatic. Several months ago, I actually put my blackberry on the top of my car and drove off. I realized it about two minutes later, when I whipped my car around to see if it was still on the roof. It was not, so I assumed it must have fallen out in my driveway. As I got ready to pull back out onto my busy street, I noticed it was in the road. It must have slid off when I whipped around after I realized I left it up there. As cars where whizzing by, I waited for the right moment to run out in traffic and grab it. Two cars actually straddled it, and I was relived it was in the middle of a lane...and I thought it would not get run over. Until some asshole swerved as he saw it, and then I watched the death of my Blackberry as parts went flying in the air. I was able to retrive all the parts, and wrench the phone back together. It would still ring, and I was even able to answer it and talk. Not much of a smartphone, at that point. Luckily, I had insurance on it...and I upgraded to the Droid, which is a much better phone. It all ended well. Not for that poor bastard, though! Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Denny Coates said...

You'd be surprised how far I would travel for an sinpired, top-of-the-line chicken salad sandwich!

Leslie said...

Wow. I went back and forth between feeling sorry for the guy and thinking he got his just reward: keeping his money in his car and watching it from the window at work? Guard dog?

Wait. Do I need to read further down. Did he get it back?

Parabolic Muse said...

Okay.
You're the blogger for me.

Unfuck me!

Danny said...

ahhh-hahahaha - i love it when bad luck befalls the elderly. its the sick cunt in me!

Alison Cross said...

LMAO - that is such a random thing to happen, it's got to be true!! Laughed my socks off at it :-D

Ali x

West Hollywood Voyeur said...

Hi SB
Happy shitty Monday! I just had 4 days off and don't want to work for the man today! I need to rob a bank and retire! I put a link to you on Voyeur on the right hand side under friends/link....so you might get some crazies reading your blog, but hey the more the merrier right.
All the best and keep em laughing!!!
WHV

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Drollgirl,
Indeed, you are not alone. Laugh.

Findon,
Not quite yet. I love you!

BMelonsLemonade,
That is quite a story, babe. Glad it ended well. Hope you had a good holiday weekend.

Denny,
I'm with you, love.

Leslie,
Nope. Old fool.

Danny,
Me too! We are birds of a feather, brother.

West Hollywood Voyeur,
Thanks for the link. You know I adore you! I don't want to be back at work either. I would have made a great family wastrel. Too bad my family is not wealthy.

Love to all of you!

SB