Wednesday, April 7, 2010

One Tahred Motherfucker

The Viking is wearing my ass out. We had sex and then argued about the Civil War. Good thing he's got some good-old-good-old, because we are not in agreement on the recent unpleasantness, as they say down home in Savannah.

Anyhoo, I am ONE TIRED MOTHERFUCKER today. But, somebody brought in homemade-from-scratch cake today, so there's that. A bitch has got to count her damn blessings! That's ONE, motherfuckers. Some poor bitches have NONE, so I'm doing okay comparatively.

I'm mostly eating the icing on the cake and throwing the actual cake part away. I only really dig the icing. If any of you fuckers mainly like the cake, we could hang out at parties. Let me know. We could swap cake for icing and shit. I don't want to hang with a bitch that covets my icing. I also don't like chocolate cake, only white. I'm a white-bread-cracker-ass motherfucker. I like white cake, white ice cream, and Wonderbread.

My sweet friend, Jeannie, gave me an award (thanks Jeannie!), and I am working on that post. So sorry I'm a slag, Jeannie. I do appreciate receiving it from you. I'm just a lazy motherfucker this week. Okay, every week. Whatever.

Hope all of you motherfuckers are having a good week. SB sends her love.

13 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

Honey, the sweeter rest is thine.
When you come visit, I'll just make you a bowl of frosting. Okay?
Good morning, sweet woman. You are loved.

Jeannie said...

No problem.

- I tend to eat the cake and leave the icing unless it's good icing like cream cheese.

I've never argued about the civil war. You can be right.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Jeannie,
You would HAVE TO FIGHT ME over the cream cheese, also. I love it and I love you.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Ms. Moon,
THE FROSTING SOUNDS GREAT! I will eat ANYTHING you make me, except for peas.

You are loved, woman!

mrs. miss alaineus said...

i'd cut a bitch for some frosting....


glad to see you are enjoying viking exploration. can we now refer to him as thor? how's the hammer of the gods hanging?


i cant think of any more viking double entendre now so until next time...


xxalainaxx

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Miss A.,
We'll stick with The Viking, but that shit made me laugh. The Hammer of the Gods is hanging just fine, babe.

Love you. Hug Mr. M. for me.

SB

Syd said...

Does the Viking wearing your ass out refer to your next post about oral sex?

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Syd,
Laugh. Good one.

The Dish said...

Wouldn't you know it? I am the cake eater. Frosting is too sweet.

Mel's Way or No Way said...

There's something about those Vikings...my sweetie is a Viking too.

I love the cake and A loves the icing. You will have to fight her for it.

Hugs to you :)

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Dish,
I LOVE YOU! We'd make a great partying pair, except we'd fight over THE BOOZE.

Laugh.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Mel,
Hugs back, babe. Hi to A.

The Dish said...

Not that booze sounds even remotely good to me today, but we would just have to make sure that we had ENOUGH booze that we didn't have to fight over it!

Much love, from my heart!