Bayesian Scam Spam

SB has gotten this scam spam the past week running. Not only is it grammatically fucked, it is ironic to me that they are trying to scam me by appealing to my sense of Christian duty. Of course, the moment that I saw how bad and broken the English is, I had to read THE ENTIRE THING. It made me laugh. I particularly like the mile-long name: Mrs. Helene Heather Thomson Sneddon. Sounds all highbrow and hoity, which I guess is the point.

In case any of you motherfuckers are stupid, don't send the information. THIS IS A SCAM. I REPEAT--THIS IS A SCAM!

Dearly Beloved in Christ,

Calvary greetings in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, I am Mrs. Helene Heather Thomson Sneddon, I am a nationality of Canada , I grew up in Iraq and I am also presently hospitalized in Baghdad Iraq , due to my illness. Presently, I'm with my laptop in this Hospital, where I have been undergoing treatment of cancer for over one year.

My husband was once the Managing Director of Shell Oil Company in Iraq , where I and my husband spent most of our lives I am a widow to Late Mr. Mark Thomson Sneddon. I have served the Lord all through my life, from long time cancer of the breast to a very critical stroke. From all indications, my condition is serious and is quite obvious that I may not live more than six months, because the cancer stage has gotten to a very severe state and my doctor has told me this The one that disturbs me most is the stroke that paralyzed half of my body.

My late husband was killed during his reign as the Managing Director of Shell Oil Company in Iraq , and during the period of our marriage we had a son who was also killed along with his father through food poison in Shell Oil Company convention of 2006 in Baghdad .

My late husband was very wealthy and after his death, I inherited all His business and wealth. Presently my doctor told me that I may not live for more than six months, though I am not scared about this, I am not afraid of death, hence I will be in the bosom of the Lord forever, any time my God calls me home, I now decided to look for an organization or an individual who is God fearing, that will use the funds for charity organization, by contributing to the development of evangelism in the world, assisting motherless babes homes and poor churches all over the world.

I selected you after browsing the Internet for this purpose and prayed over it, for the fact that I always go to God in prayers in situation like this, because He is the Alfa and Omega. I am willing to donate all the money I have in the bank, which is Ђ25,000,000.00 (Twenty Five Million Euros) to you for the development of evangelism and also as aids for the less privileged around you.

Please note that this funds is lying with a Bank in Madrid Spain , where I and my husband deposited the funds along with our family lawyer. My family Lawyer will file an immediate application for the transfer of the money in your name.

Please, do not reply me if you have the intention of using this funds for personal use, you will have a reasonable percentage of the total funds when the funds gets to your custody, before investing the remainder of the funds for God`s works.

Lastly, I want you and your church to keep praying for me regarding my health, because I have come to find out that wealth acquisition with out Jesus Christ in one's life, is vanity upon vanity. If you have to die says the Lord, keep fit and I will give you the crown of life.
SEND ME YOUR INFORMATION FOR THE ANTTORNY TO CONTART WITH YOU.

FILL THE FORM BELOW:

FULL NAMES:
ADRESS:
COUNTRY:
TELEPHONE:
FAX:
MOBILE:
MARITAL STATUS:
SEX:
AGE:
OCCUPATION:
NATIONALITY:
EMAIL:

will plead with you to please reply this email to mrshelene.thomsonsneddon@gmail.com because the one I used in writing you is not secured, so please respond to mrshelene.thomsonsneddon@gmail.com as you do that God Almighty would bless you.

May the Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the sweet fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you now and forever more, amen.

Kindly reply to mrshelene.thomsonsneddon@gmail.com

God bless you.

In His service,

Mrs. Helene Heather Thomson Sneddon.
24/03/2009