Friday, June 26, 2009

Mike Is Dead and I'm Not Feeling So Well Myself

SB is hungover and very down this morning. My dear Aunt Carol wisely used to call the days after the BIG drink, self-hater days.

Mike is dead, I am divorcing a good friend that I spent a lot of my life with, the cows in the field I pass on the way into work have their ears tagged this morning (I assume this means they are about to be sold and shipped, and yes, I am a total fucking hypocrite because I eat meat) and SB is fat, old, and tired. Mike's death just reminds me of how old I really am. If it could happen to him, it could happen to me. Anytime. If you are looking for humor today, you will not find it here.

Ironically, on the way into work this morning, I was playing my new Red House Painters CD, and there was a remake of John Denver's Sorry on it. Perfect. Yes, I am feeling sorry for myself. When I walked into work this morning, I actually had a tear sliding down my cheek. How embarrassing. I just let that sucker roll.

In a recent interview, the philosopher Johnny Depp (and I am not kidding when I say this and I am also paraphrasing) asked where is my generation's Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin. Well Johnny, he died unexpectedly yesterday. That's my answer, and as I remind you, I am not joking. Not one iota. You, dear readers, can beg to differ. That's your prerogative. I don't give a good goddamn.

Any negative comments about Mike will not be posted.

21 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

Michael is fine now. Believe me.
And you? You will be too.
Love...Ms. Moon
P.S. Just think of those cows as having gotten some new jewelry. Does that help?

All This Trouble... said...

I've been on a bit of a self hating bender myself.

As far as Mike goes, well, he's just another example of how our society would rather sit back and make fun rather than jump in, roll up our sleeves and help a brother out.

Syd said...

I'm sorry dear SB that you are feeling down. Yesterday was a very odd day in so many ways. I don't like to think about the cows going to market or the death of people before they reach old age. So I'm going to get my butt to a meeting later and then to the maritime festival. I'm going to do something upbeat.

afk4life said...

SB
Okay, first off /hug, if I were there in person I'd make you a big fixer drink and not lie to you about things being okay and dry your tears while crying my own.
I flat believe that the negative shit about MJ is bullshit. At least the later stuff, I've read enough to know that Joe Jackson should prolly be in jail and is amazing Michael got anywhere after that, much less to being arguably the best of my time.
So all I can say is, do what I've done, watch the MJ tribute stuff on YT which is good except for some weird fuckups that mean you can't watch official versions from the US. Note that Pete Wentz/FallOutBoy covered him (that says a lot right there).
And don't be scared to cry. Ppl dish on emo like it's a bad thing, but it's good. I don't trust ppl who won't cry for real, and if that same rule were applied to everyone, well, the world would be a better place.
This hits me about as hard as Cobain did and it's really tough to know how to feel about it beyond just, wow, shit.
I don't focus on age rly here. As the movie says, he's dead, you don't get any older than that, and with the time he had on Earth he did so much it makes most of us look like absolute nothing. Mostly it just scares me because I live as forever 16 also somewhat and hope something I do goes beyond this figment of existence called a life, I mean, that's the lesson I guess, try to make it count.
Anyways hugs and love, and I'm here if you want as always, hell ask for my cel i'll talk to u,
<3
Doug

Sarcastic Bastard said...

My Dear Ms. Moon,
You always help. Thank you, and I love you more than my luggage.

SB

Sarcastic Bastard said...

All This Trouble,
You got that shit right.

Love,

SB

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Dear Syd,
Good for you! Have lots of fun.

Love to you,

SB

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Thanks a lot, Doug. That was really sweet. I have the best family here at Sarcastic Bastard.

Much love back,

SB

Mark said...

See, I consider this appropriate grief. You acknowledge his status as an icon who affected you with his music. You freely admit that the real grief you feel is for yourself, for your life. Mike's death is just a stand in for all that fades, all the dreams that go south. (And he and I were born 2 months apart, so I get that part, too.)
You use pop culture as a screen on which to project affection and hostility because it's easier than dealing with those feelings in your personal life. I get it. You're anything BUT a sarcastic bastard for real, but the pose provides camouflage and protection, along with the wine. You do what you have to do until you're ready to try something different.

Lady Lemon said...

Oh, SB. I feel you on this. All of it.

I have divorced a friend or two in my day. It totally sucks ass even if it is the very best thing to do. It'll get easier with time, I think.

I am terribly sad about MJ. He was one of the greatest artists of our lifetime, despite the controversy of his later years. I was a HUGE HUGE HUGE fan as a kid. I used to go around and tell everyone that MJ was my boyfriend, though I am sure this was probably a bit shocking/scary for my old, white, southern relatives. I cared not at all. It was all about the MJ.

One thing is for sure, there will never, ever be anyone quite like him again. Feel better, and if not, have another drink fest tonight and sleep it off tomorrow. Sounds like you deserve it.

We're here for you.

Aunt Becky said...

Hang in there, SB. Sometimes you need a day to wallow--trust me, I get this completely. Extending you a big fat hug.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Mark,
Thanks, as always, for your wise words.

Love to you,

SB

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Lady Lemon,
Thanks. You are a pal. I appreciate your comments always.

Love,

SB

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Aunt Becky,
BIG FAT hug back. Thanks for reading me. You are a dear.

Love,

SB

Alec Beattie said...

As Morrisey said: 'I was happy in the haze of a drunken hour, but Heaven knows I'm miserable now.'
I'm really sorry MJ died. I wasn't a fan, but anyone who can bring so much joy to people all over the world gets my vote.
Have a few frosty Stellas and listen to sad music. Always cheers me up.
Take care.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

I will take that prescription, Dr. Alec!

Tanks a mill,

SB

~Babz~ said...

I'm so with you on this one. I can not fathom how much this affects me. Is it that I am the same age, a few months older? Is it because Mike's music marked my life as I danced in the kitchen with my sons, teaching them to dance, HIS moves from Thriller?

Non the less, I'm feeling it and for Farrah. I went out and after being talked down to, talked into cutting my knee length hair, I got the "Farrah" cut.

I feel ya SB, I really do. Have a drink on me, will ya?

birdpress said...

Sorry you are feeling so down, SB. We all have days like that. If you are anything like me, and I think you might be, just remember that it won't last forever. Just have a good cry and wallow for a while. It will pass, but we need to accept our feelings too.

Hugs to you,
laura

Sheria said...

I don't get around to reading my favorite blogs until the weekend. This is because I haven't been able to find a sugar daddy to support me in the style to which I would like to become accustomed and I have to work long hours. When I'm not working, I'm whining about all the hours that I have to work. Of course, my intent was to say some cheery words of comfort to you, but selfish hussy that I am, I've made this all about me.

I also think that J. Depp is a philospher. I just watched him on Letterman the other night and he is indeed the voice of wisdom in this age. MJ's death also reminded me of my own mortality. This dropping dead thing is very disturbing. I vote that we vow to do all the things that we've been thinking about doing beginning now--no matter how self-indulgent or crazy.

adrienne said...

i LOVE that you quote steel magnolias...

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Sheria,
I'm with you babe. Let's start doing all the shit we wanted to do and really appreciating our precious lives before we go boots up.

I'm still praying VERY HARD for your sugar daddy to appear. It could happen very soon.

Wheelbarrows full of love and fun,

SB