Friday, May 27, 2011

Adam Ant's HUMILIATION

It fucking happens, kids. Fuck you!

I have to first say that I will always adore Adam Ant and that the motherfucker still looks pretty good for an old fart, but HOW FUCKING HUMILIATING is old age, when you take the stage for a comeback and fall the fuck down and have to admit that your poor eyesight was the cause of your fall? Jesus fucking H.

I'm not too far behind the motherfucker, and all you young high-and-mighty motherfuckers have it coming. BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY that I never thought I'd get old either, and here the once hot and sexy Adam Ant and I are, with poor goddamn eyesight. I tripped and fell over a chair just the other night (the fucking cats scattered everywhere in SHEER TERROR) and am limping about today. That shit is HUMILIATING. AND IT WILL HAPPEN TO YOU, YOU YOUNG SNOTTY LITTLE SONOFABITCHES. JUST YOU WAIT! HEAR ME NOW, BELIEVE ME LATER. Some young, buff dude (like the guy in the photo above) will have to come along and help your geriatric fat ass up. And the young guy will be thinking something like: Jesus Christ, I hope I'm never a big goddamn helpless mess like your old fat wrinkly ass. [And that young man will one day be in for a rude damn awakening. And God will laugh, because he's evil like that, and he likes playing humiliating jokes on human beings.]

Link to MORE humiliating pictures of Adam's shoddy reckoning with gravity:

19 comments:

Steph(anie) said...

Even with his glasses on :(

The computer isn't helping you or me.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Steph,
I think about that too. My eyes are so damn tired at the end of the day.

Love you. Have a great holiday weekend.

Butterfly said...

Oh I'm with you on that. He was the hottest guy ever I used to kiss his poster every night before I went to sleep - yep saddo at 10 years old. Still love to meet him & frankly he can fall over on me anytime - bad eyesight might just work for me ha ha x

The Wit Continuum said...

Seriously...I can relate unfortunately, but happy to be in the same lot with you! Have an awesome weekend too, be safe, have fun, and get wasted if possible. We have a family gig, a funny uncle, and fireworks at the lcoal casino so...hey, I'm going to have a blast!
Have a great weekend! Love you always, you know...
J

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Butterfly,
I hear you, girl. Dude was gorgeous.

Wit,
I love you, too. I hope your holiday is fun and safe. Catch up with you soon.

Vintage Vixen said...

Poor bugger! He was as hot as hell when I was a teenager, Dirk Wears White Sox was always on my record player.
A couple of my mates went to that gig, I'm dying to hear what they say when i see them next week.
Love ya. xxx

Jeannie said...

I never needed to be old to fall down. I crack my shins and arms on something on a daily basis. I fall up the stairs often. I turned around the other day and smashed 4 pieces of my grandfather's (mother's?) crystal that was given to me. I'm lucky it all didn't hit the floor.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Vix,
Wish I could have gone to the gig.
I would have laughed when he fell though. It's always my first reaction.

Jeannie,
I just love you. I can't help myself.

Ms. Moon said...

Why do old people walk/dance/run like that? Because they hurt.
It's hell.

Sandy said...

Oh my.... how much I love that man! Of course you know he's the secret father of my children, don't you?! And it's not at all odd for a 46 year old woman to have a really buff poster of said Mr Goddard on her bedroom wall to drool at each time she enters and leaves the room, now is it? Or that her grown daughters have to say "hello Daddy" to it whenever they walk past it?! No, I didn't think it was, and yes, I still so would ;D x

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Ms. Moon,
Goddamn fucking right.

Sandy,
Thank you for reading and commenting. Your comment cracked me up. We'd get along just fine. Laugh. Please come back and join us often.

Love,

SB

Terena said...

First I had to FIND my frickin glasses to read what you wrote and see the picture clearly. I too used to be able to see.

Adam would look sexy with a walker.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Terena,
I know what you mean about the glasses, sister. My eyes are a damn mess.

Love to you and Queen Teen.

SB

Big Mark 243 said...

When I was a freshman in high school I used to take burnt out tubes of flourescent lights and pretend I was the 'the king of the wild frontier'..! I would also listen to 'Car Trouble' as loud as I can in my 'light blue car'..!

Just a reminesce... love ya back, SB!

Sandy said...

Will do SB. And he was only on tv half an hour after I commented... *drool*. I wondered why he was late home for dinner ;D x (Yeah, and I lost your email address :( x )

Sandy said...

Yeah, ok, so I'm a fucking dumb-ass. Your addy is on your friggin page... doh... someone shoot me now!

Syd said...

Getting old sure does suck!

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Syd,
Yes, it sucks balls.

Christina @ Fashion's Most Wanted said...

Age does suck but I bet it was a bit more than his eyesight. He still looks alright, especially without the specs! He was SO beautiful. Love you xx