Wednesday, March 16, 2011

The Latest in an E-mail this Morning to My Idol, Ms. Moon

I don’t know if I told you, but Mrs. Born-Again Biker from Hell, finally kicked the off-the-wagon Mr. Born-Again, out (he started drinking again). The landlord came and told me that the cops were called, and she signed a paper to get him thrown out. I was cautiously thrilled, but told my landlord that she was not great either. Well, last week or so, she didn’t come home to claim her kids, who somehow, the neighbor was babysitting. A friend came and picked them up and took them over to her/our house (it's a double) and then, she wouldn’t come home to take the kids off the friend’s hands, so said friend was out on the front porch, cursing loudly on her cell phone, and unfortunately, the front porch is right under my bedroom window. I opened the window and told the woman (angry loud butch type) that I had to work the next morning and it was after 11:00. She said she was sorry, but she was “pissed off” because her mother had Alzheimer’s and she needed to get home to turn her over, and Mrs. B-A was not coming home to her kids. I heard her yell into her phone: “We aren’t friends after this.” Understandably.

Last night, after 10:30,I hear yelling out in front of the house again, and I open my window to find said friend/woman and two men, drunk (or high), joking and horse-playing loudly, again right under my bedroom window. So I raise my window, and say, rather politely, I thought: “Not to be rude, but I have to work in the morning.” Said woman replies: “I know, I know, you have to work in the morning.” The men were also smart asses, apologizing exaggeratedly. Naturally, Mrs. B-A was in the house and didn’t bother to shut her friends up. I’m going over today to have a talk with her, and if it happens again, I’m going to tell her I’m calling the landlord. I was so mad, I couldn’t get to sleep for hours, so I am a damn zombie today. I could fucking murder her, and I rue the day they moved in. I had a gut feeling they would be trouble.

Also, I started taking vitamin D3, because it helps with depression, and got the dosage wrong, and instead of taking 2000 IU, I have been ingesting 10,000 IU daily, which may explain my recent bouts of insomnia. Great huh?


Jeannie said...

I hate shitty neighbors but I haven't had any like that!

Bill WAS the best president (at least that I remember). I could never understand the American propensity for over-reaction to moral misdeeds. Our Trudeau was boinking an 18 year old and the country applauded him for it and voted him in again and again.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Canadians have sense. Never mistake Americans for having sense. They are a bunch of idiotic repressed Puritans. Of course, I do not group myself with the majority of them.

Love you mucho!

Ms. Moon said...

Yeah. You get the I-Have-Bad-Neighbors award. Hey! They'll probably be doing a reality show on that shit soon and you can be on it!

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Ms. Moon,
I might be on the national news for neiborocide. Look for me!

Jane Lancaster said...

just read this article and then came straight to you! Subject this morning..noisy neighbours.. Oh god we have barking pit bulls..and when i lived in London?! argghh

Sarcastic Bastard said...

I'll check it out, love. Thanks!

Hope all is well.


Big Mark 243 said...

I think I ran into Ms. B-A and her friends last night... they were liquored up but I did not stop to ask for directions, if you know what I mean...

Christina @ Fashion's Most Wanted said...

Dearest SB, you never liked them. No wonder you're not sleeping with all those vitamins. Have a good night. Love you xx

Bethany said...

Oh poor SB. Damn.
Watch out for those butch types ;-)
Hope it gets better buddy.
Hang in there.

Lucy At Home said...

Do you think tying condoms blown up like balloons to the kids' bikes would induce them to move? If so, what are you waiting for?

Mel's Way or No Way said...

I've got gems on both sides of me these days.

Maybe we should start a commune and then we can sit back, pass judgment and choose our own neighbors.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Big Mark,
That was funny.

No, they suck basically. And I love you MAS!

Thank you, doll.

Lucy at Home,
I love the way you think. Laugh.

I'd love to live in a damn commune with you and A. and Ms. Moon and Jeannie and a few other blog family members. Believe me.

Kathleen Scott said...

SB, you were far more restrained with your peabrain neighbors than I would have been.

I don't think they deserve another talk or chance. They know they've been assholes, they just don't care. A person in your situation could reasonably think they want to get called out by authority, maybe they need stimulus to straighten out. You'd be doing them a favor by calling the police and your landlord and maybe MADD while you're at it.

Syd said...

It sounds like a Cops episode. Maybe you could dump a water balloon on their heads.