Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Dear Fat Ill-Mannered Yankee Swine Tourist

It isn't polite to ask your hostess about the shooting that was committed in the mansion to which you've been invited, especially when the shooter was the hostesses brother.

You embarrass me, ill-mannered Yankee swine tourist.

Please go back home.

Oh, when will you go back home?

Quite frankly, we will be happier to see the back of you than General Sherman.

Oh, when will you go back home, you swine?

11 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

Okay. I want to hear the entire story. Good morning, Ms. Bastard-Beloved!

Big Mark 243 said...

I'll go but when I return I'll bring more books y'all can't read, pop that will rot your teeth, and the arrogance of superiority that comes from believing in emancipation even though black people scare us as much as they do you...

adrienne said...

dearest sb,

i hope i never piss you off.

love,
adrienne

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Ms. Moon,
Good morning! It was something that happened on our visit to Mercer House in Savannah. Yes, THAT Mercer House. And it was a damn woman from damn Ohio.

Mark,
I'm not frightened of black people. I'm more frightened of white people.

Adrienne,
It couldn't happen, dear.

Love to all!

SB

Kathleen Scott said...

I lived in the heart of tourist country in Miami...we called the invaders tourons because they checked their brains at the airport & never picked them up.

So you got a trip to Savannah! Yea!!! Hope you got to share it with the Viking. Romantic country and GREAT food.

Young at Heart said...

you had me at ill-mannered Yankee swine tourist!!
x

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Kathleen,
Touron is great. I love it! And you.

Young at Heart,
I figured you'd get me. Laugh.

Syd said...

Yes, I totally understand. We are besieged by the Ohioans here too.

Mel's Way or No Way said...

Looks like my sweetie was back in town! :)

Leslie said...

Yikes. Something ugly happened!

xo

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Mel,
Good one! Laugh.

Love you and A.