The Born Again Biker Neighbors from HELL Update

I know you all have been waiting breathlessly for this shit. So here goes. . . .

About 7 or 8 weeks ago, Mr. Born Again went fucking insane after a family cookout in the back yard of our house. I personally think dude had a few Natural Lights too many.

The Viking and I were in the upstairs bedroom when we heard the fucker shouting and pounding on his wife's minivan at street level. She tore off in the van, and Mr. Born Again eloquently shouted: "FUCKING BITCH!"

Anyhoo, a few days later (after SB noticed that Mr. Born Again's heap of shit party-plate licensed car had been absent from the street in front of the house), one of the neighbors said Mr. BA had turned up the night of the FUCKING BITCH incident, drunkenly hammering on their door to use the phone. Mr. BA said: "That bitch took my phone. Can I use yours?"

Then, Mr. BA proceeded to cry around about his awful childhood (fucker is in his 30s--get over that shit already) and said that the wife was really mad because he had carved the word MOTHERFUCKING ASSHOLE in his forearm in front of the kids. Now, why would she be mad about that? I just don't get it. And also, Mr. BA proceeded to tell our mutual neighbor that he also thinks he's a vampire. He just hasn't been fully turned yet. Uhhhhhmmmm, okay.

I asked the neighbor: "Who would want to give that dumb motherfucker's sorry ass eternal life? Then they would have to listen to the fucker whine through all eternity about his lousy childhood and shit. I wouldn't turn his dumb ass either."

Last night, SB's landlord phoned and gave my ass a heads up that Mr. BA would be returning (post-rehab) to the abode. I explained that I had my reservations.

This morning, Mrs. BA (a.k.a. FUCKING BITCH) was shouting at one of her kids through our shared bathroom wall. It went something like this: "I HATE IT WHEN YOU THINK I'M STUPID! IF YOU SQUIRT IT IN ONE EYE IT WILL RUN INTO THE OTHER ONE!"

Uhhhhmmmm, okay. Clearly, she is joyfully anticipating a reunion with her spouse.