Tuesday, August 3, 2010

The Cocksucking LAZY Born-Again Bikers Next Door

Motherfucking biker in the other half of the double I live in is supposed to mow, and then he gets money off the rent. Well, I was sitting having a coffee this morning, looking over the back of the sofa and out the window, and my damn view was partially obscured by yard weeds. I shit you not. Looks like a damned abandoned house.

All the motherfucker does is whine and feel sorry for himself on the damn cell phone, right outside my window that borders on their front walk. Fucker has a huge yard and a deck out back, and he wants to sit out front by my window and piss and moan about how the world has perpetually failed his losery ass.

I wish the sonofabitches would take their damn porch cross decoration and move. By the way, all their pets are named after NASCAR speedways. Fucking redneck asshole motherfuckers.

9 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

So it's not just the south?

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Ms. Moon,
No ma'am. And I'd still rather live in the South, at least the food and the manners would be better.

Love you tons!

mrs. miss alaineus said...

does he ever blame jebus??????


xxalainaxx

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Now, Mrs. Miss A., let's not blaspheme. That's my job. Laugh.

Love you!

Jeannie said...

Lazy ass. Phone the landlord if you know how to get the number and report that he's not cutting the fucking grass.

Love you lots

Kathleen Scott said...

Shoot--I guess this means you didn't like the house you looked at.

I'd hate living next door to them too.

The method we used in Miami for dealing with this kind of problem was to get a doll from the Botanica, name it next-door-neighbor, stick it full of pins, drown it in a bucket, run over it with the bicycle and then set it on fire on the sidewalk.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Jeannie,
I did call the landlord. Great idea. Thank you. You are loved.

Kathleen,
Great method, love. That made me laugh.

Syd said...

I am glad that I live in the woods and have no neighbors. Suburbia isn't for me.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Syd,
I guess it's not for me either, but there are conveniences.