Tuesday, July 13, 2010

A Bitch Is Fried and Zombified

SB is fried and zombified this morning. It's like swimming through milk. And no, I am not on LSD, motherfuckers. A bitch is working today!

Just some mornings are harder than others. Ms. Moon (my idol) will get this shit.

On the good news front, my wrist ain't broke from yesterday's tragic fall. It's not even very badly bruised (so far). I was even able to hold the blow dryer and style my hair this morning. [My good friend, Ruth, understands THE VAST IMPORTANCE of this! We both have curly hair.] One must tame that unruly shit DOWN!

Not being able to style my hair would have been the MOST SIGNIFICANT horror that came out of my fall. Tragedy diverted! I am feeling woozy but grateful this morning.

How are all you bitches doing? Check in, please. [If I get no comments, this will be somewhat embarrassing. Let's face it, at my age, nothing is ALL THAT embarassing. A bitch bounces back quickly, or you don't make it this far. It's eat or be eaten, motherfuckers! If I teach your Special Ed asses nothing else, let it be that.]

12 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

Good morning, sweet, styled friend! I feel like I'm swimming through milk today as well. Of course, our air here is as thick as milk.
I am so glad you're wrist is okay but I am even more glad I have found you.
You are loved....Ms. Moon

ZenGato said...

I am over the work week despite it only being Tuesday. I was able to walk the stairs on my gimpy ankle this morning though, so things are looking up. Glad you didn't break your wrist, I too have super curly hair.

Mel said...

Glad you're bouncing back and no permanent damage from the fall. I know all about damage from a fall. My shoulder aches in the bone today. But I am bouncing back too. Thanks for the pep talk and for the image of swimming through milk. I feel like I'm hiking thigh deep in mud some days. Swimming in milk seems more spa-like, or at least good for your skin. Sorry I've only lurked lately, been gone, busy, hot, tired and the most boring person I know with nothing to say that's not boring.
Shit I'm boring myself already. Have a good day, my friend. Kick ass and take names. Bounce like a superball. Eat the bear. Carpe some fucking diem!

Jeannie said...

I too have curly hair but I have never learned to tame it. I try to blow it out smooth but it frizzes up before I leave the bathroom. sigh.

However, I am thrilled that your wrist is okey dokey. Wouldn't want your vibrator play to be hampered by pain.

And I know - it takes a lot more to embarrass me now too. If I'm gonna laugh in 5 years about it, I might as well do it now.

Reeny's Ramblin' said...

First day back at work over here...sucks the bag. Glad you can style your hair, I get the importance of it x

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Ms. Moon,
Your comment made my fat ass smile. Okay, I SMILED--my fat ass DIDN'T.

You are a blessing unto my life.

[Unto made it sound more stately and biblical and shit.]

You are loved!

Sarcastic Bastard said...

ZenGato,
Take care of your gimpness. You are loved.

Mel,
You are not boring. You crack me up, and SB loves you!

Jeannie,
We are sisters in frizz. I adore you.

Reensters,
I weep for you. Work sucketh mightily. Selfishly, I am glad you are back though. Mwa.

Kathleen Scott said...

Fried & Zombified. Tuesday morning poetry. I'm going to remember zombified. That's worth plagiarizing.

My answer to curly hair is biosilk. Sticks all those separate vibrating strands together into ringlets. At least on my head. I know...not everyone likes Shirley Temple. But it's cute in silver and I like it better than my natural Angela Davis.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Kathleen,
You have gorgeous hair. I wish mine was as thick as yours. Thanks for the tip.

Mwa,

SB

The Dish said...

I love you, and glad your wrist is functional.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Dish,
I love y'all back. And so am I. Thank you.

Christina @ Fashion's Most Wanted said...

Dear SB, I'm very glad your wrist is ok and you can still do your hair. I wish I had curly hair. I have to put heated rollers in mine to get it to do anything. You always want the opposite to what you have. Love xx